Surviving during an Apocalypse isn’t easy especially with all the brain-dead paper-consuming zombies in our midst, but here are a few hacks that just might help you see this through to the other side. The first thing you want to try to avoid is unnecessary ER visits so these hacks will help you to resolve medical emergencies on your own and stay healthy.
1. Avoid ERs and sutures—During the onset of the quarantine I became involved in a nasty confrontation with a food mandolin and I lost. I lost part of my finger and my dignity, but fortunately I had plenty of sterilized bandages, gauze, medical tape and crazy glue at my disposal. Yes crazy glue. When confronted with a bad cut but that may require stitches but not amputation, allow the wound to bleed 10 seconds or more to flush out impurities, wipe and then apply pressure with sterilized pad to stop or slow the bleeding. If that doesn’t help after 15 minutes or so apply ice or ice pack wrapped in cloth and constant pressure. Slow down the bleeding enough to apply a liberal amount of crazy glue on the wound. It will seal and heal the wound. Reapply new crazy glue as necessary every day or two until it’s no longer necessary. You won’t re-grow lost tissue but who needs it anyway?
2. Burn remedy—The finger wound had just about resolved itself when my stove burned up causing me to switch to an Induction Heat hot plate on a kitchen table! For some inexplicable reason I placed my hand in the center of a pot on an induction plate and burned my entire hand, leaving my skin indelibly etched in the bottom of the pan. Fortunately I have plenty of Avon’s Maximum Strength Cracked Heal Cream on hand. This is a miracle drug. Not only does it have pain relievers that kick in within 5 minutes of application, it rapidly soothes and heals burns. You can actually watch the blisters shrink and disappear over the course of hours. With repeated applications as necessary, incredibly the hand was healed in days. No medicine chest should be without it.
3. Scarves—with masks being rarer than a Sumatran rhino, if you’re immune compromised you need to think of alternative solutions, hence the scarf. While it’s not foolproof, it adds an extra layer of protection you would otherwise be without. Pull it up at the store or doctor’s office and remove when you are outside.
4. Exercise daily— Exercise is, or should be, an important part of everyone’s daily routine, but even more so when you’re cooped up at home. There is NO excuse, no not one why everybody but the most critical of patients can’t exercise in place. Things you can do that require no equipment: run or walk up and down the stairs. Carry a large can in each hand and do bicep flexes while doing so. Do floor exercises. Pull stored equipment out of attic or basement. Set up in front of tv. And my personal favorite--DANCE! Turn on the music and just start dancing to your favorite tunes. You don’t have to be good, you just have to MOVE!
5. Vitamin C—Some doctors have stated that large doses of Vitamn C can boost resistance against the virus. The jury is still out but since Vitamin C is water soluble rendering it impossible to OD on, why not try it?
6. Sunshine—It is critical for maintaining a healthy body and especially a healthy mind, and should be sought out every day. Go outside if you can, even if you’re only sitting on your front steps. But remember, even if it’s an overcast day, you can get a sunburn if not properly protected, so always used sunscreen if you’re going to be outdoors for longer than 20 minutes. If it is impossible to go outside, find a window with sun exposure and sit in front of it for a minimum of 20 minutes a day.
7. Space-- Maintain space within your quarantined environment—Too much togetherness eventually breeds conflict so give your partner and your kids, even pets, some breathing space. Block off time each day for alone time, and/or quiet time. Even if you’re family is confined to a small space, activities like reading, puzzle-building, homework and certain projects can be done together but separately and quietly. Sneak away for a bubble bath or long shower when the others are occupied. Take a long bath and a few deep breaths. This too shall pass.
8. Acrylic nails--If you have acrylic nails that won't be patched in the next week or so you will be in for big problems if you attempt to remove them all at once by yourself, especially if you've had them a long time because the acrylic weakens and thins natural nails. First you need to carefully file or clip them much shorter yourself to reduce chances of a sudden rip. Then assess the condition. If they are cracked, carefully remove chips to let nail bed breathe and gently buff rough edges. You want to carefully remove them and expose them to air. If they are sore, apply Avon's Maximum Strength Cracked Heal Cream and a bandaid overnight. After the entire nail is removed, cover them with Nail Base or Top Coat. Wear rubber gloves to wash dishes the first few days they are finally removed.
9. It's spring! Start rummaging through your family closets and gathering up all the outgrown items, including coats, gloves, boots, hats and scarves and ready them for donation to my Coats for Kids and Homeless Challenge! HAHAHA! We will be collecting as soon as the ban lifts. If you're only a neighbor in spirit and not locale, you can donate them to your favorite charity when the ban is lifted because you know when you're released you'll be making up for lost time and will be too busy to do this important task later. Stay healthy, friends.
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